black…MYstory

Before anyone gets on me about blaming Oprah or bashing a “leading black”, hear me out.

Recently, it was reported that allegations of physical and sexual abuse of girls at the hands of a matron (dorm parent) working at the all-girl Leadership Academy she opened in South Africa had surfaced.

According to South African police, the woman in question is accused of choking and beating some students and is also accused of fondling at least one girl there. The matron has been suspended. Another matron and the school’s principal, Dr. Mzimane, had already been placed on leave prior to the alleged fondling incident.

For her part, Oprah has issued tearful apologies to students and their families but, as far as I know, has not made any public statements about this issue in the U.S.

However, could it be that Oprah, unintentionally, created an environment where such abuse could thrive? One Chicago Sun-Times columnist thinks so and I am inclined to agree. The rules of the school state that parents are only allowed to visit their children once a month. Also, children are only allowed to use their cell phones and email on the weekends.

In this country, we know that abuse also goes on in schools but, knowing that a parent could show up at any time, that a kid could call a parent at any time or that, at day’s end, a parent could know what happened, would not embolden many to say the wrong thing to a student, much less put their hands on a child. By keeping these children, as the columnist put it, as “virtual prisoners”, they were left at the mercy of an abuser.

Also, let’s be real, this was supposed to be a dream come true for poor parents to offer their daughters an education that they might not have otherwise received. So, for the sakes of their children, they went along with the rules. But, from what I understand, many parents complained of this arrangement. It now appears that these complaints went unheeded, to the detriment of some students there and to the detriment of the school’s and Oprah’s reputations.

I believe that her school was and still is a wonderful idea. But, perhaps Oprah should actually listen to parents and learn the lessons that the abuse in her own past should have taught her — kids need to be able to talk to their parents about anything. In order to do so, they actually need to be given the actual ability to do just that. It is in silence and secret that abuses like these are allowed to flourish.

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